Meh.

So...

Today was better than yesterday. Still depressed. Still homesick. But at least I didn't break out into tears in the middle of the day in front of everybody. That would have been bad. But I get to go back down south tomorrow, and I get to stay with my sister for a while, and get to see the rest of my family that I hadn't seen in a while. That should help some. And I'm starting a 100 Themes challenge on my dA account, and writing usually helps me. So maybe that'll help.

Well, I'm off to do more browsing. Later, guys.

Tired

Guys, I am so tired. Of everything.

I'm homesick, I'm depressed, and I don't know why. I'm just tired of everything right now. Monetary issues, Fraternity issues, school, not having my own vehicle, not having a job.... Just everything. I want to go home. I'm ready for Christmas break. I'm ready to see my family and just get away from it all. I want my own place. Like, my own apartment. (Not that I don't love my roommates, because I do). I'm just ready for a break from reality. From all the sickness, migraines, stress. Depression. I can't stand it. And because I'm depressed, it's affecting everything that I'm doing/supposed to be doing. I just..... I haven't been this depressed in a REALLY long time, guys. And I have no idea why it hit me so hard, or so fast. Why it hit me at all, really. I really miss my grandmother, and wish that she was here with me right now. I miss Charlie. I miss how everything used to be. Sometimes I just want it all to go back to how it used to be. Back when I was really little, and didn't really know what depression was yet. I miss my sister. And I saw her a few weeks ago and will see her again over Christmas break. Maybe (hopefully) this weekend.

I don't why it hit me now, or this hard. I just know that it did. And that I want it to go away.